today is a good day.  

its the first day i have woken up without feeling ‘depressed’. usually i dont believe in depression, but the last couple of weeks there was nothing that i could tell my brain to make it stop being sad, angry, motivation-less and stressed….which made me more angry. i am incredibly stressed but i still have a great life so why was i feeling shitty ALL OF THE TIME. well im almost in tears cos i am happy i have this old happy me back and i missed it.   

so im sitting here thinking why i had uncontrollable sadness for no reason, and ive realized that i havnt had alcohol in my system for a while now (i had been drinking liquor almost everyday as somewhat of a coping mechanism) and honestly think my body was going through withdrawals and maybe now its out of my system…i have been unusually sweaty the last couple of nights….. i think im gonna just stay away from drinking. its shitty. 

and i usually hate internet rants but maybe this will be good advice for  somebody. whatever

oh AND my skin is FINALLY starting to clear up since i stopped drinking.